Scum Of The Earth by Shel Silverstein
There was a group called called Scum of the Earth And they say they got their birth In a basement bar on Greek Street down in Soho The bass man he smoked grass and the drummer he kicked ass And the lead guitar ate speed while everybody boogied The drummer’s name was Mavis he was […]
Sarah Cynthia Slyvia Stout Would Not Take The Garbage Out by Shel Silverstein
Sarah Cynthia Sylvia Stout Would not take the garbage out! She’d scour the pots and scrape the pans, Candy the yams and spice the hams, And though her daddy would scream and shout, She simply would not take the garbage out. And so it piled up to the ceilings: Coffee grounds, potato peelings, Brown Bananas, […]
Rosalie’s Good Eats Cafe by Shel Silverstein
It’s two in the mornin’ on Saturday night At Rosalie’s Good Eats Café. The onions are fryin’, the neon is bright And the jukebox is startin’ to play. And the sign on the wall says, IN GOD WE TRUST, ALL OTHERS HAVE TO PAY. And it’s two in the mornin’ on Saturday night At Rosalie’s […]
Rock ‘N’ Roll Band by Shel Silverstein
If we were a rock ‘n’ roll band, We’d travel all over the land. We’d play and we’d sing and wear spangly things. If we were a rock ‘n’ roll band. If we were a rock ‘n’ roll band, And we were up there on the stand, The people would here us and love us […]
Ring Of Grass by Shel Silverstein
Rings of grass crowns of flowers they’re gone gone gone gone Furs that I woven of whispering hours gone gone gone gone She’s gone away where the rings are real And the furs have warmth that a woman can feel Round and round round goes the wheel And she’s gone gone gone gone gone Rings […]
Recipe For A Hippopotamus Sandwich by Shel Silverstein
A hippo sandwich is easy to make. All you do is simply take One slice of bread, One slice of cake, Some mayonnaise One onion ring, One hippopotamus One piece of string, A dash of pepper – That ought to do it. And now comes the problem… Biting into it! ————— The End And that’s […]
Put Something In by Shel Silverstein
Draw a crazy picture, Write a nutty poem, Sing a mumble-grumble song, Whistle through your comb. Do a loony-goony dance ‘Cross the kitchen floor, Put something silly in the world That ain’t been there before. ————— The End And that’s the End of the Poem © Poetry Monster, 2021. Poems by topic and subject. Poetry Monster […]
Polly In A Porny by Shel Silverstein
Haha I kissed Polly goodnight haha as we stood at her front door Now she’s quite a proper lady so I didn’t ask for anything more But haha I was feeling oh so groovie that I went down to the movie And I sat down and guess just what I saw I saw Polly in […]
Point Of View by Shel Silverstein
Thanksgiving dinner’s sad and thankless Christmas dinner’s dark and blue When you stop and try to see it From the turkey’s point of view. Sunday dinner isn’t sunny Easter feasts are just bad luck When you see it from the viewpoint Of a chicken or a duck. Oh how I once loved tuna salad Pork […]
Pathetic Way Of Getting Over Me by Shel Silverstein
Oh if you read in the papers that she’s been seen A gettin’ in an out of some millionare’s long custom made limousine She may fool you with her smile but I can see That’s just her poor hopeless heartless helpless pathetic way of gettin’ over me So you were down at Joe’s on the […]
On The Way To The Bottom by Shel Silverstein
On the way to the bottom I met an ole friend of mine He said “Buddy, I do believe this is the end of the line” I said “The end of the line” Shoot, come on and have another round And if we’re headin’ for the bottom We still got a long way down On […]
Never Bite A Married Woman On The Thigh by Shel Silverstein
Never bite a married woman on the thigh oh my Cause she just can’t rub it off no matter how she’ll try And when she gets home at night her man will ask her why Then she’ll say it’s just a birthmark or some other silly lie But he’ll get suspicious and then he will […]
My Mind Keeps Movin’ by Shel Silverstein
Walk into a restaurant with chicken on my mind Look at the menu I want roastbeaf and wine A waitress comes up I order baked beans and bread Oh when she brings it I want ham’n eggs instead Because my mind keeps a movin’ bouncin’ and a groovin’ A flippin’ floppin’ every whichaway From minute […]
Morgan’s Curse by Shel Silverstein
Followin’ the trail on the old treasure map, I came to the spot that said “Dig right here.” And four feet down my spade struck wood Just where the map said a chest would appear. But carved in the side were written these words: “A curse upon he who disturbs this gold.” Signed, Morgan the […]
Melinda Mae by Shel Silverstein
Have you heard of tiny Melinda Mae, Who ate a monstrous whale? She thought she could, She said she would, So she started in right at the tail. And everyone said,”You’re much too small,” But that didn’t bother Melinda at all, She took little bites and she shewed very slow, Just like a little girl […]
Mama I’ll Sing One For You by Shel Silverstein
I’ve sung my songs on dusty roads and dirty city sidewalks To sweatin’ hard eyed brakemen, in the rail yards I rolled through I’ve sung in blue wall papered rooms to girls I played at lovin’ Now Mama…I’ll sing one song for you Mama let me tell you that I’ve never lost the mem’ry Of […]
Makin’ It Natural by Shel Silverstein
I’m gonna throw my grass out the window Crumple up my papers too Give away my speed, Cause all I’m gonna need Is just a little bit of love from you And we’ll be makin’ it natural And ain’t it just about time That stuff I was so keen on I no longer have to […]
Lookin’ For Myself by Shel Silverstein
You may be lookin’ for me but I ain’t lookin’ for you I’m still lookin’ for myself and I ain’t got time to look for nobody else When I found who I am and where I am And if you come round again maybe then baby maybe then You wanna follow me but honey can’t […]
Little Abigail and the Beautiful Pony by Shel Silverstein
There was a girl named Abigail Who was taking a drive Through the country With her parents When she spied a beautiful sad-eyed Grey and white pony. And next to it was a sign That said, FOR SALE-CHEAP. “Oh,” said Abigail, “May I have that pony? May I please?” And her parents said, “No you […]
Listen To The Mustn’ts by Shel Silverstein
Listen to Mustn’ts, child, listen to the Don’ts. Listen to the Shouldn’ts, the Impossibles, the Won’ts. Listen to the Never Haves, then listen close to me. Anything can happen, child, Anything can be. ————— The End And that’s the End of the Poem © Poetry Monster, 2021. Poems by topic and subject. Poetry Monster — the […]
Lemmebesomethin’ by Shel Silverstein
Now if I can’t be your hotdog lemme be your little weiner Baby if I can’t be your regular man lemme be your in betweener And if I can’t be your human torch lemme be your submariner Well hey baby don’t you leave me this way lemme be somethin’ Yeah If I can’t be your […]
I’ve Been Working So Hard by Shel Silverstein
I’ve been working so hard you just wouldn’t believe, And I’m tired! There’s so little time and so much to achieve, And I’m tired! I’ve been lying here holding the grass in its place, Pressing a leaf with the side of my face, Tasting the apples to see if they’re sweet, Counting the toes on […]
In The Hills Of Shiloh by Shel Silverstein
Have you seen Amanda Blaine in the hills of Shiloh Wandering through the morning rain through the hills of Shiloh Have you seen her at her door, listening for the cannon’s roar And a man who went to war from the hills of Shiloh Have you heard her mournful cries in the hills of Shiloh […]
In Search Of Cinderella by Shel Silverstein
From dusk to dawn, From town to town, Without a single clue, I seek the tender, slender foot To fit this crystal shoe. From dusk to dawn, I try it on Each damsel that I meet. And I still love her so, but oh, I’ve started hating feet. ————— The End And that’s the End […]
I’m So Good That I Don’t Have To Brag by Shel Silverstein
Now I’m warnin’ all you women don’t stand too close to me cause you might catch fire Now you’re talkin’ to a man in a whole other kind of bag Well I’m three parts tiger and one part snake I’ll ball you to sleep and I’ll bite you awake And I’m so good that I […]
I’m My Own Grandpa by Shel Silverstein
It was many many years ago when I was twenty-three, I was married to a widow, she’s as pretty as can be. This widow had a grown-up daughter who had hair of red, my father fell in lover with her, and soon these two were wed. I’m my own grandpa, I’m my own grandpa. It […]
If The World Was Crazy by Shel Silverstein
If the world was crazy, you know what I’d eat? A big slice of soup and a whole quart of meat, A lemonade sandwich, and then I might try Some roasted ice cream or a bicycle pie, A nice notebook salad, and underwear roast, An omelet of hats and some crisp cardboard toast, A thick […]
If I Had A Brontosaurus by Shel Silverstein
If I had a brontosaurus I would name him Morris or Horace; But if suddenly one day he had a lot of little brontosauri I would change his name to Laurie. ————— The End And that’s the End of the Poem © Poetry Monster, 2021. Poems by topic and subject. Poetry Monster — the ultimate repository […]
I Once Knew A Woman by Shel Silverstein
Well now I once knew a woman listen while I tell you all about her yeah And the first time I seen her I knew I couldn’t live without her Well now she swore she’d love me all her life and I knew I’d do the same God damn but I don’t even remember her […]
I Can’t Touch The Sun by Shel Silverstein
No I can’t touch the clouds for you I’ve never reached the sun for you I’ve never done the things that you need done for you I’ve stretched as high as I can reach I guess I’m not the one for you Cause I can’t touch the clouds or reach the sun for you No […]
I Call That True Love by Shel Silverstein
You gotta wake up every mornin’, tip toe in the kitchen cook me great T-bone steak Serve it to me in bed go down the street and hustle bring me back all the money you make You gotta rub my body with sweet scented oil, cool me with a ‘lectric fan Run to the church […]
Hug O’War by Shel Silverstein
I will not play at tug o’ war. I’d rather play at hug o’ war, Where everyone hugs Instead of tugs, Where everyone giggles And rolls on the rug, Where everyone kisses, And everyone grins, And everyone cuddles, And everyone wins. ————— The End And that’s the End of the Poem © Poetry Monster, 2021. Poems […]
Hippo’s Hope by Shel Silverstein
There once was a hippo who wanted to fly — Fly-hi-dee, try-hi-dee, my-hi-dee-ho. So he sewed him some wings that could flap through the sky — Sky-hi-dee, fly-hi-dee, why-hi-dee-go. He climbed to the top of a mountain of snow — Snow-hi-dee, slow-hi-dee, oh-hi-dee-hoo. With the clouds high above and the sea down below — Where-hi-dee, […]
Hector The Collector by Shel Silverstein
Hector the Collector Collected bits of string, Collected dolls with broken heads And rusty bells that would not ring. Bent-up nails and ice-cream sticks, Twists of wires, worn-out tires, Paper bags and broken bricks. Old chipped vases, half shoelaces, Gatlin’ guns that wouldn’t shoot, Leaky boasts that wouldn’t float And stopped-up horns that wouldn’t toot. […]
Hard To Please by Shel Silverstein
(To be said in one breath) Elaine gives me a pain, Gill makes me ill, Winnie is a ninny, Orin is borin’ Milly is silly, Rosy is nosy, Junie is loony, Gussie is fussy, Jackie is wacky, Tommy is balmy, Mary is scary, Tammy is clammy, Abby is crabby, Patt is batty, Mazie is lazy, […]
Handy Man by Shel Silverstein
Well on a Monday I’ll be slingin’ hash Tuesday I’ll be collectin’ trash And on a Wednesday I might be tendin’ bar Thursday I’ll be the guy who parks your car On a Friday I might be teachin’ school a Saturday finds me hustlin’ pool I got a whole lotta talents in demand that’s why […]
Hamlet As Told On The Street by Shel Silverstein
Now Francisco and Bernardo, they was guardin’ the castle, Leanin’ on their spears, not lookin’ for no hassle, Havin’ themselves a brew or two, When out in the night they hear woo-wooo-wooo. And here comes this ghost, lookin’ ragged and rank, In a rusty suit of armor, goin’ clank, clank, clank. They say, “Hey, Mr. […]
For What She Had Done by Shel Silverstein
She had to die. This Omoo knew. He also knew he could not kill her. Not even try to kill her. Those eyes. Would look at him. Not even try. So, what to do? There was one Ung. Who lived in a cave. Beyond the hard mountain. A foul cave. Far from the village. Ung, […]
For Sale by Shel Silverstein
One sister for sale! One sister for sale! One crying and spying young sister for sale! I’m really not kidding, So who’ll start the bidding? Do I hear the dollar? A nickel? A penny? Oh, isn’t there, isn’t there, isn’t there any One kid that will buy this old sister for sale, This crying and […]
Folk Singer’s Blues by Shel Silverstein
Well, I’d like to sing a song about the chain gang And swingin’ twelve pound hammers all the day, And how a I’d like to kill my captain And how a black man works his life away, but… What do you do if you’re young and white and Jewish? And you’ve never swung a hammer […]