Picture a dark and terrible night,
In a Treehouse my friends sat by candlelight,
Shadows and whispers, eyes gazing at me,
First to be dared was Bobby Magee.
Bobby was Irish and terribly thin,
His father was hairy and liked to drink Gin,
To be in our Club was Bob’s number one plan,
But first up to pass was the entrance exam.
Now, to be honest, our membership’s really quite fair,
It only involves one horrible dare,
And others watched Bobby from out in the gloom,
Everyone knowing their turns would come soon.
Bobby would have to perform at his best,
But he didn’t anticipate this horrible test,
Long serving members all let out a sigh,
They knew all to well that the time was nigh.
Now, eating some worms isn’t such a big deal,
It’s not cruelty to animals, it’s only a meal,
And Bobby was worried, he couldn’t conceal,
The fear in his eyes was certainly real.
In a moment, he grabbed them and started to chew,
The candidates watching all started to spew,
Bobby’s complexion then suddenly changed,
And the next thing that happened was positively strange.
I watched him start swelling, filling the room,
His skin turned transparent, just like a balloon,
And I tell you this, not wanting to gloat,
But for reasons unknown, Bob started to float.
Never had I witnessed something like this before,
And I watched poor young Bobby float out of the door,
Then up to the moon, he started to fly,
Up like a rocket, to the starry night sky.
Yet the Irish boys body couldn’t keep up,
With the mystery gases inflating his guts,
You probably guessed it and already know,
Bobby Magee was about to explode!
With a deafening clap and a horrible wheeze,
His earthly remains floated off on the breeze,
It’s the end of my story, you may not believe,
But that was the tale of Bobby Magee.
